Like most people in Australia, I have not exited the country for over 2 years. So it’s safe to say, having crossed a dateline over international waters and spent 11 nights of glorious sunshine and Mai Tais on the shores of Honolulu, I am now a travel expert.
Let me share with you how to do Hawaii (which is become VERY Xy) on a budget. (You’e welcome.)
Living My Lest Life— Sheraton Princess Kaiulani
Before You Leave
If international travel wasn’t already stressful enough, with all your carefully chosen outfits squished into a suitcase, PASSPORT, tickets and minute portions of onboard liquids–enter Covid 19.
To enter the USA, you need to be double vaccinated. Your booster status is not relevant. Download your international vax certificate via your Medicare app from Service Australia.
Thankfully the most nail-biting part of the equation— waiting for your Covid test results a calendar day before travel has been struck off the list.
You do need to fill out your attestation form. If travelling as a couple, please ignore the option to make a joint application. We did this, and after lining up to check-in for half hour had to step out of the line and fill in ANOTHER attestation form separately. It’s small things like this that can really push one over.
We also brought a printed copy of our travel insurance. Make sure you check the Covid policy on whoever you chose because you never know when THAT virus will strike and destroy another special occasion. Your first overseas trip in years? Covid sees you.
Also, cash. Do grab a few thousand USDs before you leave (you’ll certainly need at least that in Hawaii). The exchange rate was very average. I changed AUDs at the Red Rate Currency Exchange in Chatswood and that was marginally better than what the bank was offering. Every dollar counts.
We travelled in a group spread over 3 hotels, so communication was paramount. Sure, you can log in to the local wifi and use Whataspp, but we wanted more freedom than that. So, we ordered local SIM CARDS from Sim Corner and they were game-changer. At only 67 AUD we had unlimited wifi and free local calls. I can’t tell you how good it was to not worry about running out of wifi for the obligatory, daily “look at me with a cocktail on the beach” social media uploads. Also, the convenience of having an American number was PERF for restaurant bookings. It’s also great to know you won’t be returning home with the additional international phone bill to pay.
Finally, the bumbag has returned to its rightful place—a chic and highly functional fashion accessory. The Zjoosh bumbag in the retro hue of pewter (peeeeewter—such a great colour) was big enough to accommodate my passport, wallet, sunglasses, and trusty Revlon Lip oil. The perfect travel bag.
So, now, you’re ready to get on that plane.
The Flights
When our friend first alerted us to the Jetstar flight sale to Hawaii, I thought: I won’t even care how bad the flight is, as long as I’m on it. What a load of crap.
My last flight was an Air Etihad business class seat to Madrid. I’ve never fully recovered (I now identify as a rich person).
This delusion of grandeur collapsed abruptly when I found myself on the said economy Jetstar flight to Hawaii. The novelty of being on a plane wore off in about 5 minutes. And then it got real when the captain announced that the “engineers” could not fix the entertainment system. I repeat: COULD NOT FIX THE ENTERTAINMENT system. I understand the plane had been sitting in the Mojave desert during the global pandemic, but seriously—NOT THE ONBOARD MOVIES.
This was the first flight I had EVER boarded without even as much as a WHO magazine to read. Nothing. But then the lights were connected to the entertainment console, so YUH. I read the menu and memorised the wines I would order (white, red and sparkling).
The comforting sound of the drinks trolley did not happen until HOURS into our flight. My tips for surviving a budget flight are pre-ordering all the food on offer and adding the bundles, because you will be fed first.
We did Plus on our departing flight, which included 20 kilos of checked-in luggage, and Max on the return, which had 30 kilos of luggage. We added more food to the ticket (keep in mind the food is not good but still food nonetheless, and you may want to eat through your emotions). Also, for what it’s worth, add the entertainment package. Bring your own water because it could be hours before you are offered a liquid of any sort. Also, neck and back pillow plus a movie device in case you find yourself left to your own thoughts.
Arrival
You’ve touched down, vowed you would never catch an international economy Jetstar flight again, and hello, Hawaii! Even at 8 am, the sun was shining because we were not in Sydney, where the skies were a constant pre-apocalyptic grey and floods were imminent.
Another hot tip: pack swimwear, beach throw, Havaianas, hat and sunscreen in your carry-on. Our flight arrived super early in the morning, and we couldn’t check in to our room till after 3 pm. It was a deliciously warm morning with a balmy breeze whispering through the palm trees. So when we arrived at our hotel, we quickly transitioned to our holiday attire. It took just one 29USD cocktail served in a pineapple to seal the deal—our Hawaiian holiday (on sort of a budget) had begun.
The Hotel
Of course, our fantasy hotel is the pink palace of The Royal Hawaiian. It’s my everything. (We made several cameo appearances at its lush bar, appropriately named The Mai Tai Bar, to imbibe delicious, overpriced Mai Tais and poke bowls). However, not actually being a rich person, we had to scale it back when it came to accommodation costs.
Sheraton Princess Kaiulani is a 3-star hotel directly across the road from the main beach and Ala Moana Surfrider, and it’s also part of the same Marriot group. However, WAY more affordable than all their hotels. Sure, the rooms are a little tired, and it doesn’t have the wow factor of its luxe sister hotels, but hello, at a third of the price, it’s excellent value. I booked my room through the Bon Voy app during The Black Friday sale. We secured an ocean view room in the Ainahu Tower (the renovated part of the hotel) for 150 USD a night. Of course, there are the taxes and then the RESORT FEE on top of that. What is the resort fee? Don’t ask. Just ANOTHER unnecessary extra cost of going to Hawaii (it adds about an additional AUD 50 per night to your stay). Being a Sydney escapee to a tropical destination that isn’t suffering the El Ninos, costs.
Apart from the absurdity and expense of the resort fee—I had no complaints. Sheraton is a fab choice if you want an incredibly central hotel with decent rooms that get serviced every day and across the road from the beach.
The hotel has a towel system, where you receive a towel card when you return your towel each day. The towel exchange is where you hire your beach chairs. Hiring them for a week at 20 USD is a no-brainer as sitting perched on the sand, people watching, Mai Tai in hand is an enjoyable and cost-effective activity.
We went completely rogue and opted to forgo the hotel breakfast. This was a massive departure for Halls On Tour, as I used to live for eating my body weight over a hotel buffet brekkie. But it was a welcome change.
Instead of starting the day with unbridled gluttony, some mornings (3) began with a workout, and the rest involved a short stroll across the road to Kona—the only decent coffee place. America is generally pretty sucky at coffee. It’s certainly not a religion like it is in Sydney and Melbourne. However, Kona Coffee roasters is a Hawaiian coffee roaster that is the best on the island. They had a cute little café attached to Moana Surfrider, where we would meander for our mid-morning caffeine fix and a teeny tub of bircher or chia pudding. Warning: It closes around 2 pm.
Walmart
We received this tip from a frequent Hawaii visitor: make a trip to Walmart and stock up on supplies early in your vacance. We took a 12-dollar uber there on day 4 of our trip and wished we had done it sooner. The gigantis that is Walmart has EVERYTHING you need. We bought our snorkelling gear, some Hawaiian souvenirs like shirts, grass skirts for the kids, super strength Melatonin, wine, cheese…It’s all there. The ubiquitous ABC shops also have a great selection of stuff, but WALMART is next level. Saying that, I’m not sure if there was a book section. One bizarre thing I discovered—Hawaii does not sell reading material. I have no idea why, but at the time, there was no magazine section at the ABC stores. After scaling Waikiki beach, I could not sight one newspaper, magazine or book. It’s all very Truman show. BYO reading material is essential.
The Food and beverages
I knew from the outset that I was going to Hawaii for swimming, sunsets and Mai Tais on the beach, not for a culinary experience.
Still, one can’t survive on sand and vodka alone
Our favourite restaurant is still The Cheesecake Factory. It’s so laden with deliciousness that we don’t normally eat. Naughtiness like deep-fried macaroni cheese balls and burgers (I really like to pile on the kilos when on vacance). It’s a vast restaurant stuck proudly in the 90s with its gilded finishes and powder yellow walls. It seems to run with military precision with a massive menu and a million staff who work hard for their tips. It’s consistent, and we’ve always had a great time there. Plus, the people watching from the outside area is really quite amazing. We’ve only ever eaten one portion of cheesecake in our many times of dining there because we’ve always been so stuffed with high carb content.
For something a little more upmarket, we did Basalt. Lovely but a tad X. Do avoid the Modern Hotel bar for drinks and snacks—really not good (could have been a bad night) but fab location for sunset photos. We also did Yum Cha at Jade Dynasty Seafood Restaurant in the Alo Moana shopping mecca, which was pretty delish.
We had our daily Mai Tais from the Moana Surfrider’s Beach Bar which we took on the beach. And then there was the day when we made our own by purchasing a variety of liquor from the ABC store and then a $20USD pineapple slushy (sold near the surf-board rentals). All of us were dreadfully heavy handed and realised we never be bartenders.
And of course, nothing beats a pricey yet fresh tuna poke bowl at The Royal Hawaiian coupled with an overpriced Mai Tai at sunset.
There was also a taco night at Duke’s on a Tuesday. This was not as budgety as planned due to the cocktail and Pinot consumption. When at Duke’s, do try the Hula Pie.
Hot tip: For securing an actual reservation, arrive in person at 3pm, be charming, have an American phone number, and you should get a table at your desired time, providing your entire group is present.
Adventures
So I’m just going to say it: The Halls are not adventure people. However, we do love snorkelling. And Hanauma Bay totally brought it in the snorkelling department. You do need to book in advance. If you didn’t pre-book like us, turn up anyway because it is possible to nab an impromptu booking. But do turn up early. We caught an Uber from our hotel at around 9:30 am for about 25-30 USD, which took just over half an hour.
It was indeed an incredible snorkelling experience. You can hire your snorkel and mask there, but we prefer to use our own (see Walmart). The array of fish was spectacular. I’ve never seen SO many vibrantly coloured fish sporting incredible designs—it was a feast for the eyes. Hanauma Bay was the perfect place to STAY all day with its crystal clear water and palm tree-fringed shore. Instead, I was coerced onto my first hike. Why is walking up a mountain better than snorkelling? I now know for sure that it is not.
If, like myself, you have a pre-existing injury and are not keen on the idea of falling to your death or breaking a hip, then just stay on the beach. It’s obvious.
This hike was literally the remains of what looked to be an old railway track. There was nothing you could grab onto to steady your ascent and friends; it was STEEP. My eyes focused on each laborious step as I placed one foot in front of the other on the near-vertical climb. Muttering obscenities under my breath as the sun hit my back, I reached the halfway mark, where I arrived at a highly hazardous part of the trek. There was even a warning sign! This is when I finally came to my senses and started the descent, which was just as perilous. My show-off friend, who had been training for this hike for months, was miles ahead. He got to the top, loved himself, and flew down because his knees, unlike mine, are still abundant with Cartledge. All I could think of the whole time was: why? Why do people hike? So not enjoyable.
Hot Tip: If you like hiking, do the hike BEFORE the snorkelling. We did it the other way around, and that was ridiculous, as was the entire hike, because why leave a perfect beach to risk one’s life? Why?
Shopping
Not being made of money and on a sort of a budget, we hit the Waikele Premium Outlets. Four of us shared an Uber, which was around 25USD. It’s always a good idea to assemble some list beforehand unless you want to end up with a plethora of unwearables. My favourite port of call is always the Saks Off 5th outlet (there is also one in Alo Moana that we found to be even better than the one in Waikele). Some of the bargain-basement goods we procured—Raybans, Carreras and other designer frames for a fraction of the cost (39-59 USD), great shoes that still receive compliments, menswear labels like Lacoste, Vince and Penguin. And also some fabulous costume jewellery if you are partial to a statement earring.
Tony Bahamas had some fantastic bargains. We bought beautiful gifts of shirts and other clothing items that were of excellent quality and really affordable. Plus, the staff were lovely and gift-wrapped everything. There were many shoe options, a discount perfumery for your favourite fragrances and a shop for discounted makeup goods with the likes of Clinique, Mac and Bobbi Brown. Suppose endless bargain hunting makes you hungry (and thirsty). In that case, I HIGHLY recommend exiting the compound to the restaurant area and heading STRAIGHT to Chillis for some Tex Mex. This is where I literally drank a margarita the size of my head. It was perfection, as were the nachos.
Returning Home
All good things must come to an end. It’s unfortunate. (I always think of my good friend who, 4 days before her trip ends, can be found crying in the shower, anticipating the return to normal life.)
First things first: purchase extra luggage before your rock up to the airport. We did this with our Max bundle on our Jetstar flight. Even with 30 kilos check-in and 7 kilos of hand luggage, it was an ACTUAL ART FORM of layering and squeezing to get all that gear into the suitcases.
Ensure that you have filled in DPP and uploaded all your docs before arriving at the airport. This is irritating but more annoying if you have to do it in the queue at check-in. At the time we had to get an expensive RAT test at a medical centre and load it onto the app, but thankfully this isn’t the case anymore.
Hot Tip: Allow the FULL 3 HOURS to check-in. We got there just under 3 hours and only just made our flight as there was not enough staff at the airport to handle all the Australians returning home. And this again is where snacks and liquids are essential. You will be standing in many queues to check-in, security, or some other body scanning thing—all of it a little stressful. A pre-made cocktail, chocolate macadamia nut, or some type of treat will soften the blow. The food available at the airport is awful and absurdly expensive.
So, friends, there you have it—Hawaii (Honolulu) on sort of a budget. How I miss endless sunshine, swimming in the ocean and day drinking.
Until next time.
Bon, voyage!